Life, Love, Travel & the Pursuit of Dreaming a Little Bigger (Musings through Jordan) 

‘What if I fall?’ enters my head as I near the edge. But then I think to myself ‘oh but darling, what if you fly? You mustn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger my love…’

It has been an incredible journey that I am on and it all started because I decided that I had to take action and I wanted more from life. I would leave behind a safe, stable, comfortable life because good was not good enough, that I wanted great ~ amazing even and allowed myself to be open to the universe and people.  Somewhere along the way, I found the courage to face and transform my fears. I have had a fear of heights since I was a child. While I have never allowed it to prevent me doing things, it is only recently that I noticed that unease that I used to feel with heights has eased or disappeared in certain situations. I am not sure when or why it happened but there is something about those views that makes it all worthwhile. 

And the second change has been the hardest but the most meaningful and rewarding. I am a perfectionist with a tendency to be exacting and demanding especially with myself. If I made a mistake, I would replay it over and over and beat myself up in a way that I would never to anyone else. That I could help others brush themselves off, shake off the negativity, learn, and move on from a mistake was ironic. But I stopped calling myself an idiot or stupid, and I started addressing myself as amor (felt easier to be loving in Spanish for some reason) then later on I would say to myself darling. Solo travel has shown me that I will always have to rely on myself so I should learn to really value myself even in those not great moments.

One of the most beautiful and inspiring things I have read recently was on one of my friend’s Instagram post. She talked about how she “repeated all the mantras she had been meaning to tell herself but too intimidated by the confidence it takes to mean them”.   So go whisper to the depths of your being, the words and phrases that you are meant to hear and I shout this into the universe to you: Be brave, be strong, be confident…live and love the life that you are meant to.  Be open to the universe and be the maker of your own destiny ~ with much light and love ❤️

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